we are meant to shine

As I walked in the woods this morning before class, a deep exhale breath easily took me to a place of deep sadness.  For just a moment.  I kept walking and kept breathing.  Then I took another big breath in and believe it or not, something Nelson Mandella said, came into my mind. 

“Who are we not to shine?”

Who are we not to be our very best self?  

We’re here for that...here to grow into our very best self and carry that self out into the world. 

No matter what the situation is...no matter how dire, or challenging, no matter how joyful, all that is required is that we show up as our best self.  There are things swirling around me, heavy things, challenging things and heartbreaking things.  I believe most people can say this.  We question the best way to help or support or forgive or show up for someone else.  Maybe we even think we don’t have the right to be joyful when another is suffering.  I can worry and stew and talk endlessly with whomever will listen to my concerns and my problems.  Sometimes. that is what is needed but sometimes what is needed more... is taking one step towards my own health. 

How do we take care of our bodies and our spirits when faced with a busy life and all of it’s challenges?  How do we love ourselves...because it is in those practices that we find the strength and courage and capacity for being our best.  How do I fill my spirit and care for my body so that I show up as my best self.  What brings me to my true north, to my own center?  It’s not a thing someone else can do for me or bring me to.  I believe it is what we are here to learn.

Filling our spirit allows us to shine it out into the world.

Through our yoga practice, the intelligence of our minds connects with, is infused with and joins the wisdom of our bodies.  Our bodies contain the wisdom of the forest, the beauty of a sunrise, the peace of a summer evening.  It is this force, this power that we find on our mats.  In the presence of millions of miracles contained in our bodies, we are grounded in truth.

In the end, that’s actually all that I have control over.

We are here to shine.

We are meant to shine.

All things are our relatives. What we do to ourselves, we do to everything. -black ELK

Dharma - the first aim in life - as written in ancient yoga texts, is the action you take to live your beliefs.

Simply put, it is walking the walk.

This is the belief that I was thinking about this week: my world is a reflection of my heart.

The love in my life is directly related to the love in my heart, the drama and chaos in my life is related to the fear.

The beauty I see in the world is directly tied to my ability to see and know my own beauty.

We are as open minded as we are open hearted. We cannot look on the world without judgement and fear without open-hearted compassion.

We can cultivate fear and hate as readily as we can cultivate love. This is our choice. Each day we get up and choose which we will feed and allow to grow within us, within the relationships around us.

Yoga is the physical practice of matching the insides with the outsides. It is a practice of letting go and opening. It works from the outside in. Our bodies respond to the efforts that we make and our minds begin to come along for the ride.

What we receive, we are able to give. We cannot give what we do not have.

We develop patience as we hold a posture…we stand taller, more balanced, our chest lifts…we become aware of our mental chatter, of our breath, of the placement of our feet on the ground.

We feel gratitude at our own efforts.

With our breath we begin the subtle art of self love by simply quieting our mind. We become a little easier on ourselves.

We glimpse our own magnificence and we see it reflected in the world around us.

What we do to ourselves, we do to everything.

I never lose the opportunity of urging a practical beginning,

howevever small, for it is wonderful how often the mustard seed germinates and roots itself.

- Florence Nightingale

A yoga class, for me, is the simple practice of breathing and moving, of opening

to the idea of loving my body and paying thoughtful attention in a community of people that help support my intention simply by allowing for me to do that

and stand next to me in my commitment to the relationship I have with myself and my desire to carry that thoughtful attention out into all of my relationships.

As we breathe together, an intimate connection takes place. All of the trappings of our lives fall away and it’s just us…

here together…trying to keep our balance and touch our toes. Noticing and embracing our perfectly imperfect efforts.

Each day, we begin right where we are, without expectation or judgement, but with love and acceptance.

Each time we practice in community, we practice connecting….

first to ourselves and then to others.

What we do for ourselves in a yoga room with our practice…the positive energy we create together, is a small, yet profound force in our lives and in our world.

is that girl still there?

I sometimes forget

that I was created for joy

my mind too busy

my heart too heavy

for me to remember

that I have been

called to dance

the sacred dance of life.

I was created to smile

to love

to be lifted up

and to lift others up

O sacred one

untangle my feet

from all that ensnares

Free my soul

that we might

Dance

and that our dancing

might be contagious.

-Hafiz

After a long conversation with a friend as I sat in the winter sunshine, I am filled with joy.  A natural, easy friendship and connection that has spanned nearly our entire lives.  Today, laughing and planning and even tears at our reflections at a life that goes by so fast. 

Have we done everything we wanted to do?

I look at pictures of myself of over 32 years ago and ask that girl, “is there anything you were dreaming of that I have not yet done?”  I look at her face and tears fall down my cheeks.  Cry at her beauty, her big brown eyes and smile.  A time before ANY of life has really happened for her.  It is still the beginning, at 29…a face wide open with hope and possibility.  

Time goes by so fast. 

Blink and here I am at 61.  No longer in the beginning, today, we laughed at our joke of being on the downhill side.  A lifetime has passed and my eyes are no longer so wide open. 

My dearest and oldest friend touches that 28-year-old girl in me, even now.  She simply sees her and reminds me that she is still there… she is still beautiful and she shines a bright light in the world wherever she goes. 

My friend sees only the best of me.

Why is it that we do not see that in ourselves?

Always I’ve asked and continue to ask, what is my purpose.  Now, in this next chapter of my life, what is my purpose?

Through the words of my friend, through my own writing, my reading, the answer keeps presenting itself in subtle ways.  Looking back through photos and time, at my life, so full.  We all live such big lives that we cannot possibly grasp them at the moment we reside in.  We are quite naturally caught up in the living of this moment.  It’s only upon reflection, I think, that I can grasp the magnitude that is my life. 

I look at those pictures with a sense of wonder at my own beauty and my own courage.

Is that girl still there?

Sure, she is.  Life has made her more thoughtful, more aware, less selfish, put lines on her face but she is still there and I love her.

the little things

this magical moment…

don’t sweat the small stuff…

it’s the little things…

the way time flies when we’re absorbed in something we love. art that makes you feel something but can’t put into words. the first cup of coffee in the morning. tea in your favorite cup. a walk in the woods at dawn. the smile of a friend across a roomful of strangers. the first bite of the first tomato from the garden.

in our yoga practice, the careful way we place our feet on the mat in each posture. the deep breath we send to the tips of our fingers as we extend tall.

it isn’t really or simply the little things though…

it is our own ability to pay attention, our belief that our attention to the little things matters.

paying attention to the little things is what makes them magical and the more we practice, the more our capacity for doing so, grows in our lives.

our dreams are planted in our hearts for a reason.

pay attention…

the little things have always been the big things.

with our careful attention, the moments become magic and a life of magic moments becomes a magic life.

change the world

“We are stars in skin

the light we seek is within.” -Rumi

I don’t believe we are here to change who we are, but to become all of who we are.

Yoga is simply the practice of deconstructing barriers we hide behind, releasing stories that diminish our light, peeling back layers and allowing grace to unfold within us.

The asana uses the physical practice of yoga to begin the process of deconstructing barriers in our bodies- the places we grasp for dear life-

the breath moves into the cracks we begin to create, layers of tension and holding release…

allowing light trapped deep inside to glow. We walk taller, we feel stronger, our shoulders move down away from our ears and our chest broadens. Our face relaxes and our lips open into a smile. As our grip releases, our palms open, our toes spread.

There is space for love to pour in and light to flow out.

We begin to allow our true selves to be seen and our own light to shine.

As this happens, we give others permission to do the same

and we change the world.

self love

My yoga practice is one of the practices of love and thoughtful attention I give myself in order to show up for my relationships in loving and open ways.

It’s a practice that touches every part of me.

I don’t consider it a gift of luxury but one of necessity for myself and all of my relationships.

Rolph Gates wrote: “Our body is the home of our spirit. It is the means by which we enact our beliefs, therefore, the maintenance of our bodies is a spiritual duty, an act of love, not only towards ourself, but towards all of humanity.”

Practicing, we turn belief into action by embracing a path that is about freedom, connection and love. As we care gently and lovingly for ourselves, we begin to deconstruct the blocks to love in our own lives.

We have to start somewhere and yoga says we start where we are, on the physical plane with the physical acts of our bodies. Each step we take, each time we show up to our mat is a confirmation of our ability to live a better life.

As we practice, we begin to develop the ability to act with great tenderness.

We breathe, we move and we care lovingly for our body and our spirit.

i am connected to my feet

TS Elliot: “hell is where nothing connects”

Our yoga practice gives us the experience of connection.

We all come from a culture that teaches safety is to be found in separation. This creates an underlying tension, I believe, because deep down we are connected and we all crave intimate connection.

We know that what happens over there, also effects us over here.

In our bodies, this may show up with the simple list of inadequacies we show up with. My shoulder hurts, my legs are really tight, I’m not very flexible, I’m not very good at yoga.

What we think effects the way we feel about ourselves.

Yoga is not about results or the most advanced variation of a pose. It simply asks us to begin where we are, at the place everyone begins,

with our relationship to our bodies.

We show up and just breathe.

We breathe space into our stiffness and into our inflexibility. Energy begins to flow and move and release as we open. We remember our feet in a posture when our focus is elsewhere.

This thoughtful attention expands like the ripple affect on a pond all through our bodies.

The transformation is miraculous as the practice begins to break through layers of separation and bring us deeply to ourselves.

Our mind enters an ancient dance with our bodies

and we experience connection.

Dynamic Exchange

In Deepak Chopra’s book, The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success,

the universe is described as a dynamic exchange of energy.

Giving and recieving.

In yoga, we give it our all in a posture and then receive the benefits of our efforts. We carefully place our feet, engage the muscles of our legs, pull our bellies in, raise our arms and extend upward in lunge pose…

breath and energy moving freely through an area of the front body that we often protectd and contract. The benefit of this breath, energy flow and extension can be profound.

Another way to participate in this dynamic exchange of the universe, is with gratitude for every little thing we receive.

Gratitude allows us to experience the natural flow of energy that supports every need and desire, including our need for joy, laughter, love and connection.

There is a kaleidoscope of sensation and exchange that is my experience with yoga. Firm & relaxed, steady & sweet, firm & relaxed, giving & receiving. These seemingly opposite actions are the container, while our own experience of yoga is often difficult to describe.

Like trying to describe listening to a piece of music to another-

we must hear it for ourselves.

Yoga asks us participate fully, trust ourselves, allow the dynamic exchange of energy to move through us as we extend, open, receive and with a breath of gratitude,

let go and allow the feeling of joy to wash over us.

Good things to come

Yoga embodies the idea of good things to come.

Once we realize we can actually part with whatever it is we’ve been hanging on to…the 10 year old Tshirt with sentimental value, the clutter of our lives…we begin to understand that we are making space for something better. Good things are on their way if we can just clear some space.

When we begin to notice the places and ways in which we hold tight, that’s also when we begin to realize we can actually let go.

As our breath deepens, our shoulders drop. As we let go a little, we feel a little space. It feels so good, we begin to trust ourselves and let go a little more.

We stop struggling against the current, push away from the bank…and float.

A wind catches our sails.

Lighter and freer…we look up.

Suddenly, we are filled with the joy of absurd good news.

stop

i went on a noisy walk a few days ago. the sound of my own footsteps, my breathing, the racket in my brain going on and on and on…kept me company. then….quite suddenly

i stopped. i held my breath

i looked….

at the light through the trees.

i looked at the tree tops against the sky.

i listened…

the quiet was absolute. my mind pouring itself like water into the moment.

in stillness there is space for us to experience moments of real grace,

grace that touches a place deep inside ourselves that is pure joy.

there’s a little space at the top of an inhale or the bottom of an exhale, between all the trying and doing and breathing and postures. we inhale deeply, pause at the very top for a few beats…and allow our breath to bring us to stillness and to this very moment.

yoga reconnects us to the stillness that is in our hearts and develops our ability to pay loving attention to the moments of our days.

this decision that we make, to be present…to look…to listen…to allow ourselves to see... that is the real work.

it is also a place for moments of real grace.

Turn on a light

I read a quote by Marianne Williamson recently, “If you want to chase away the darkness, you can’t beat it over the head with a baseball bat. You have to turn on a light.”

It takes an almost impossible effort some days to see the ordinary good moments and keep our attention…there.

How did we decide that challenge, sacrifice and suffering were more noble and honorable places for our attention…as we puzzle at the darkness we find ourselves in.

Yoga asks us to turn on a light. Pay loving attention…to our bodies. We begin there, right where we are. With practice, the breath and the postures begin to reveal to us our own beauty. We start looking inward for the light.

We notice the balance in our feet, the strength of our hands, the length of our torso, the curve of our lips and the smile, that lights up our face.

This morning, allow yourself to be amazed at your own courage, at your own strength, at your own beauty and graceful movement.

Yoga is a dance with grace. Let gratitude be your organizing principle as we begin to dance.

Gratitude

“Be grateful for you life, every detail of it

and your face will come to shine like a sun

and everyone who sees it will be made glad and peaceful.” -Rumi

I think it’s a lovely reminder that the smallest shifts we make, not only affect us but also those around us.

Every day we wake up, we have the opportunity to begin with intention…to recreate ourselves however we would like to show up in the world, today.

The habit of beginning with intention, will permeate every aspect of our lives. Not an intention to change who we essentially are, but to become all of who we are.

We get an opportunity to begin again and again with gratitude as the organizing principle and energy.

Imagine, as you begin from a place of gratitude for your own efforts, that your body begins to respond and to open.

Yoga asks us to begin just where we are, to give loving attention and gratitude to our own bodies and to all the moments of our days.

Every Once in Awhile

we are given real moments of grace.

What could be more important than the manner in which we experience this very moment? Isn’t a life the threading together of moments?

2500 years ago in the Tao Te Ching, it was written that contentment is not complacency,

it is reverence.

I imagine, from a place of reverence for this very moment, we love well by simply being all of who we are and being fully present. This allows us to give back something essential and something sustaining. I believe that it is in the moments in which we lose ourselves in the present that we experience grace.

We just need the courage and the faith to embrace the days of our lives

moment by moment

practice loving well and being fully present.